Wrestling Undertaker Assets

Bryan's return date is OFFICIAL Photo Credit: WWE.com Welcome to a feature I like to call "Best in the World" rankings. They're not traditional power rankings per se, but they're rankings to see who is really the best in the world, a term bandied about like it's bottled water or something else really common. They're rankings decided by me, and don't you dare call them arbitrary lest I smack the taste out of your mouth. Without further ado, here's this week's list: 1. Daniel Bryan (Last Week: 1) - Bryan's comeback finally feels completely real as his WrestleMania match is set. He'll team with Shane McMahon against Sami Zayn and Kevin Owens, and while most people are speculating as to whether or not Bryan will turn heel (lmao, as if Zayn and Owens are the real heels here), I'm speculating if McMahon's diverticulitis will be okay enough for him to wrestle by then. I'd love to see someone turn on Bryan to lift him away from thi...

BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER Photo Credit: WWE.com Welcome to a feature I like to call "Best in the World" rankings. They're not traditional power rankings per se, but they're rankings to see who is really the best in the world, a term bandied about like it's bottled water or something else really common. They're rankings decided by me, and don't you dare call them arbitrary lest I smack the taste out of your mouth. Without further ado, here's this week's list: 1. Daniel Bryan (Last Week: Not Ranked) - So, Bryan announced that he was cleared to wrestle and immediately took an apron bump on his way back to a presumed match at WrestleMania. What an absolute legend. He could have just put someone in a YES! Lock and been done with it, but when you're Bryan BY GOD Danielson, you don't half-ass things. You put the stank on it. I can't wait to see what he has in store at Mania and beyond. 2. Kota Ibushi (Last Week: Not Ranked) - The Golden Love...

DuVernay did well with A Wrinkle in Time Photo Credit: Joe Pugliese Welcome to a feature I like to call "Best in the World" rankings. They're not traditional power rankings per se, but they're rankings to see who is really the best in the world, a term bandied about like it's bottled water or something else really common. They're rankings decided by me, and don't you dare call them arbitrary lest I smack the taste out of your mouth. Without further ado, here's this week's list: 1. Ava DuVernay (Last Week: 3) - I actually saw A Wrinkle in Time on Friday with my son, who wanted to see it, and it was actually really good. I had my problems with it (glossed over some things a bit too fast, didn't really dig Levi Miller's or Mindy Kaling's performances), but overall, it was stunning. It was colorful, bright, hopeful, all things that modern blockbusters seem to want to eschew nowadays. DuVernay really should be proud of this film. It's ...

"AND NOW, HERE'S BEETHOVEN'S NINTH." Photo Credit: WWE.com Welcome to a feature I like to call "Best in the World" rankings. They're not traditional power rankings per se, but they're rankings to see who is really the best in the world, a term bandied about like it's bottled water or something else really common. They're rankings decided by me, and don't you dare call them arbitrary lest I smack the taste out of your mouth. Without further ado, here's this week's list: 1. Braun Strowman (Last Week: 3) - I'd like to say that I'd have rated him higher if he had put Elias through the piano, but what's higher than number one? Would I have to name him God? That's blasphemy. Joey Janela's already God. 2. Meiko Satomura (Last Week: Not Ranked) - Satomura was announced for Fight Club Pro's April Fool's Day card against Pete Dunne, which only means one thing. Pete Dunne's gonna die. 3. Ava DuVernay (Last W...

The real winner of Oscar weekend, even if he didn't win all the awards he should have Photo Credit: Emma McIntyre/Getty Images Welcome to a feature I like to call "Best in the World" rankings. They're not traditional power rankings per se, but they're rankings to see who is really the best in the world, a term bandied about like it's bottled water or something else really common. They're rankings decided by me, and don't you dare call them arbitrary lest I smack the taste out of your mouth. Without further ado, here's this week's list: 1. Jordan Peele (Last Week: Not Ranked) - So what, Get Out didn't win Best Picture, nor did Peele win Best Director. However, the Oscars are kind of a sham, right? I mean, in what universe is Crash the best picture of any year? Peele did take home an Academy Award for Best Original Screenplay, but even more satisfying, he got widespread praise from most critics and fans who saw his unique and groundbreakin...

Braun Strowman has become Death, Destroyer of Chambers Photo Credit: WWE.com Welcome to a feature I like to call "Best in the World" rankings. They're not traditional power rankings per se, but they're rankings to see who is really the best in the world, a term bandied about like it's bottled water or something else really common. They're rankings decided by me, and don't you dare call them arbitrary lest I smack the taste out of your mouth. Without further ado, here's this week's list: 1. Braun Strowman (Last Week: 1) - Strowman didn't win the Chamber match but he pretty much made Roman Reigns' job easy for him. I mean, he eliminated an entire normal Elimination Chamber's worth of competitors last night. Technically, he should be given some kind of win, but you know the Monster Among Men isn't content taking technicalities. My guess is he'll go and level North Henderson tonight in retaliation. Or maybe just kick Reigns across ...

BRAAAAUUUUUUNNNN Photo Credit: WWE.com Welcome to a feature I like to call "Best in the World" rankings. They're not traditional power rankings per se, but they're rankings to see who is really the best in the world, a term bandied about like it's bottled water or something else really common. They're rankings decided by me, and don't you dare call them arbitrary lest I smack the taste out of your mouth. Without further ado, here's this week's list: 1. Braun Strowman (Last Week: 4) - Look, how could I not put Strowman first. The goddamn cello puts him in the running for greatest RAW segment of all-time. Seriously. 2. Joel Embiid (Last Week: 6) - Embiid played in his first all-star game last night and continued the process along of adopting Russell Westbrook, first by hitting a RAINBOW of a three pointer over him from WAY downtown and then chasing him down and blocking him at the other end. Lord help the Oklahoma City Thunder if they're on the...

THE MAN, THE MYTH, LEGEND Photo Credit: Alex Brandon/AP Photo Welcome to a feature I like to call "Best in the World" rankings. They're not traditional power rankings per se, but they're rankings to see who is really the best in the world, a term bandied about like it's bottled water or something else really common. They're rankings decided by me, and don't you dare call them arbitrary lest I smack the taste out of your mouth. Without further ado, here's this week's list: 1. Jason Kelce (Last Week: Not Ranked) - Kelce got dressed up like a mummer, drunk as a skunk, and made the most epic victory speech of all-time . It was such a fuckin' awesome wrestling promo that he should go down to the Performance Center to teach them after his football days are over. If he ever has to buy a drink in Philly, everyone in this city will have failed at life. 2. Asuka (Last Week: Not Ranked) - Sasha Banks and Bayley are great wrestlers, but really, they'...

Is WrestleMania ready for Asuka? Photo Credit: WWE.com Welcome to a feature I like to call "Best in the World" rankings. They're not traditional power rankings per se, but they're rankings to see who is really the best in the world, a term bandied about like it's bottled water or something else really common. They're rankings decided by me, and don't you dare call them arbitrary lest I smack the taste out of your mouth. Without further ado, here's this week's list: 1. Asuka (Last Week: 3) - Look, everyone, myself included, talked a lot about Ronda Rousey, but Asuka was the real star of the show. No one was ready for Asuka, as always, and now she'll get to go to WrestleMania and cut through whoever is holding the title she chooses to challenge for like a goddamn buzzsaw. It will be fun. I bet passersby will be amazed by the unusual amounts of blood. 2. Velveteen Dream (Last Week: Not Ranked) - Imagine watching him come out for his match with K...

Cox, right, along with Derek Barnett, helped lift the Eagles into the Super Bowl Photo Credit: Mitchell Leff/Getty Images Welcome to a feature I like to call "Best in the World" rankings. They're not traditional power rankings per se, but they're rankings to see who is really the best in the world, a term bandied about like it's bottled water or something else really common. They're rankings decided by me, and don't you dare call them arbitrary lest I smack the taste out of your mouth. Without further ado, here's this week's list: 1. Fletcher Cox (Last Week: 4) - The Eagles are going to the Super Bowl, which I'm still trying to process, mainly because the defense once again came up huge. Cox helped lead a gigantic pass rush that rebounded after the Vikings marched down the field on its first drive and held them to zero points the rest of the game. Cox was a monster, breaking through double teams, swallowing up the running backs, and chasing Ca...

Let's see how long this lasts Screenshot credit: WWE.com Welcome to a feature I like to call "Best in the World" rankings. They're not traditional power rankings per se, but they're rankings to see who is really the best in the world, a term bandied about like it's bottled water or something else really common. They're rankings decided by me, and don't you dare call them arbitrary lest I smack the taste out of your mouth. Without further ado, here's this week's list: 1. Asuka (Last Poll: 4) - Asuka's partner for the Mixed Match Classic was announced today, The Miz. In addition to being the favorite team to win just because of how destruction and cheating form such a formidable duo, the possibility exists that at some point, Asuka will kick Miz's head clean off his shoulders for no other reason than she can, which is always primo. 2. Joey Janela (Last Poll: Not Ranked) - Missed in TWB's winter break was the first wrestling match o...

Miss u, Carrie Photo Credit: Lucasfilm Welcome to a feature I like to call "Best in the World" rankings. They're not traditional power rankings per se, but they're rankings to see who is really the best in the world, a term bandied about like it's bottled water or something else really common. They're rankings decided by me, and don't you dare call them arbitrary lest I smack the taste out of your mouth. Without further ado, here's this week's list: 1. Carrie Fisher (Last Week: Not Ranked) - I could have put nearly anyone from Star Wars, Episode VIII: The Last Jedi here, but Fisher has a special place in my heart for obvious reasons. It's my favorite installment in the franchise. Like, I saw it Saturday night and I'm still buzzing about it, both as a fan and as a critical thinker about art, even if it's corporately-produced art enriching the Disney Corporation. Fisher's final living turn as General Leia Organa (I have no doubt she...

THE MAN Photo Credit: Getty Images Welcome to a feature I like to call "Best in the World" rankings. They're not traditional power rankings per se, but they're rankings to see who is really the best in the world, a term bandied about like it's bottled water or something else really common. They're rankings decided by me, and don't you dare call them arbitrary lest I smack the taste out of your mouth. Without further ado, here's this week's list: 1. Joel Embiid (Last Week: 5) - I understand that the Sixers lost a couple of awful games last week and are on a bit of a slide, but goddamn, if Embiid isn't a wizard on the court. When Ben Simmons gets fully used to NBA speed and starts turning the ball over less, this team is going to be unstoppable. Trust the process, always. 2. Asuka (Last Week: 6) - Seriously, am I the only one who thinks Absolution vs. Asuka is a mismatch... in favor of Asuka? You're going to need to make this Women's Ro...

More examination of the above two's past lives in ROH this week Photo Credit: WWE.com Wednesday is upon the world, and only the rest of today and two more days stand between you and the weekend. You've made it this far, congratulations. However, I fear you may need help to get to Friday afternoon. FEAR NOT goodly reader, for I have the solution to your problem. Below are the best links that lead to some of the finest writing about wrestling from the past week. They will surely aid you in your quest to get through the working week and get to the weekend, where you can drink precisely one be... wait a second, I already rip that @dril tweet off for another weekly post that I do, don't I? Ah well, just click the goddamn links below, alright? Hey, have you checked out last week's TweetBag? Do it, because it's got a nice mix of questions from the users of Twitter. [ The Wrestling Blog ] Also check out the Best in the World Rankings if you haven't already. TWB has some...

Bryan back soon? Photo Credit: WWE.com Welcome to a feature I like to call "Best in the World" rankings. They're not traditional power rankings per se, but they're rankings to see who is really the best in the world, a term bandied about like it's bottled water or something else really common. They're rankings decided by me, and don't you dare call them arbitrary lest I smack the taste out of your mouth. Without further ado, here's this week's list: 1. Bryan Danielson (Last Week: Not Ranked) - Honestly, I have to bring him back to the list because the rumblings are coming around again that he's been cleared to wrestle. The Sun is reporting it , which makes it dubious, and the actual report says that Danielson has been cleared by his own doctor and not Dr. Joseph Maroon, which means it's not a change on the last time the news was prominent. However, everyone knows Maroon is, quite bluntly, a maroon, and also that WWE is getting a bit despe...

You don't fuck with Strowman, even if you're Triple H Photo Credit: WWE.com Welcome to a feature I like to call "Best in the World" rankings. They're not traditional power rankings per se, but they're rankings to see who is really the best in the world, a term bandied about like it's bottled water or something else really common. They're rankings decided by me, and don't you dare call them arbitrary lest I smack the taste out of your mouth. Without further ado, here's this week's list: 1. Braun Strowman (Last Week: 5) - The legend of BRAUUUUUUUUUUUN grows with each passing minute, even though Team Smackdown really didn't even try to dispose of him last night. I mean, Roman Reigns smashed him up against a wall in a car. Miz and Co. dumped him in a garbage truck. All those Smackdown loonies did was suplex him through a table? Get the fuck outta here. Strowman at least had the last and best laugh by demolishing Triple H to close the show....