Wrestling Undertaker Assets

They tore the pyramid down on Sunday Photo via New Japan Pro Wrestling Strong Style Evolved was nothing to write home about, compared at least to both G1 Special shows from last year. Sure, the wrestling was fine, especially on the back-half of the show. If you edited some of the slog parts out of the Hangman Page/ Knife Pervert Jay White match, that turns into a fine semifinal title match on a strong B-show. The Kazuchika Okada and Tomohiro Ishii vs. Zack Sabre, Jr. and Minoru Suzuki match was a delightfully violent feud-furthering interstitial that helped heap more coal into the furnace for the Okada/Sabre IWGP Championship match this coming Sunday. Several other matches had fun moments. However, while the G1 Specials felt like marquee events, Strong Style Evolved had a distinct house show feeling to it. The show, up until the end of the White/Page match, felt fun but inconsequential at best. Then, the Golden Lovers and Young Bucks took the ring and gave the event its raison d'e...

BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER Photo Credit: WWE.com Welcome to a feature I like to call "Best in the World" rankings. They're not traditional power rankings per se, but they're rankings to see who is really the best in the world, a term bandied about like it's bottled water or something else really common. They're rankings decided by me, and don't you dare call them arbitrary lest I smack the taste out of your mouth. Without further ado, here's this week's list: 1. Daniel Bryan (Last Week: Not Ranked) - So, Bryan announced that he was cleared to wrestle and immediately took an apron bump on his way back to a presumed match at WrestleMania. What an absolute legend. He could have just put someone in a YES! Lock and been done with it, but when you're Bryan BY GOD Danielson, you don't half-ass things. You put the stank on it. I can't wait to see what he has in store at Mania and beyond. 2. Kota Ibushi (Last Week: Not Ranked) - The Golden Love...

PIZZZZZZAAAAAAAAAAAAA Photo Credit: TH It's Twitter Request Line time, everyone! I take to Twitter to get questions about issues in wrestling, past and present, and answer them on here because 140 characters can't restrain me, fool! If you don't know already, follow me @tholzerman , and wait for the call on Wednesday to ask your questions. Hash-tag your questions #TweetBag , and look for the bag to drop Thursday afternoon (most of the time). Without further ado, here are your questions and my answers: FMK: new york pizza, chicago pizza, st louis pizza � TV's Brent (@TVsBrent) February 14, 2018 For those who don't know, FMK is the "fuck, marry, kill" game, usually played with three people. It's crude, but it relays certain desires. It's way less problematic when done with food, unless you're one of those kinky mfers who likes foodplay in the bedroom. Note, I am not here to fuck the pizza. In this case, the "fuck" is for pizza I'd e...

ROUSEY NEWS! Photo Credit: WWE.com Today is the most important day of the week. Why? Valentine's Day? NO, that's just a day invented by WWE to honor Greg The Hammer. Ash Wednesday? Pfft, Jesus Christ was a mark. No, it's HORB NEWSLETTER DAY. That's right, PRO WRESTLING SKOOPZ is back with your man HORB FLERBMINBER bringing you the high heat on takes and all the fresh news. Who has the better handle on news? Not Bruce Mitchell, that's for damn sure. HE SPENDS MOST OF HIS TIME ON REDDIT BEING SHOCKED AT KENNY OMEGA'S SEXUALITY. You can just read the newsletter, but why would you just  want to read the newsletter? That'd be like going to a Brazilian steakhouse and not wanting to fuck the meat. IT FEELS GOOD AGAINST YOUR GENITALS. You should want to get the FULL HORB EXPERIENCE. First, follow me @ HorbFlerbminber  on Twitter. If you don't follow me on Twitter, how will you know when news breaks? Hell, how will you know when wind breaks at Titan Towers? VINCE...

THE REAL STAR FROM SUNDAY Photo Credit: WWE.com Hey, did you know who's back this week? No, it's not CM PUNK. He's off planning BENGHAZI 2: BENGHAZI HARDER. How did I get that information? WOULDN'T YOU LIKE TO KNOW. No, HORB FLERBMINBER IS BACK, and he's taking no prisoners. YOU HEAR ME, BRAD SHEPARD? I KNOW YOU STOLE ALL MY SCOOPS AND PASSED THEM OFF AS YOUR OWN. Just remember that next time you go to Panera Bread and order a breakfast sandwich. THEY BUY THEIR EGGS FROM ME, AND I HAVE PLENTY OF WEAPONIZED LISTERIA TO GO AROUND, MOTHERFUCKER. Of course, you want to get the whole HORB EXPERIENCE. You don't just read the newsletter and think to yourself, "Oh, this is just enough Horb to get me through the week," because if you do, YOU'RE A FUCKING MARK. You're not a FUCKING MARK, are you? Then first, you have to follow me on Twitter, @ HorbFlerbminber . Nowhere else will you find the best news that I stole from the brain of psychic bugs who have ...

Is WrestleMania ready for Asuka? Photo Credit: WWE.com Welcome to a feature I like to call "Best in the World" rankings. They're not traditional power rankings per se, but they're rankings to see who is really the best in the world, a term bandied about like it's bottled water or something else really common. They're rankings decided by me, and don't you dare call them arbitrary lest I smack the taste out of your mouth. Without further ado, here's this week's list: 1. Asuka (Last Week: 3) - Look, everyone, myself included, talked a lot about Ronda Rousey, but Asuka was the real star of the show. No one was ready for Asuka, as always, and now she'll get to go to WrestleMania and cut through whoever is holding the title she chooses to challenge for like a goddamn buzzsaw. It will be fun. I bet passersby will be amazed by the unusual amounts of blood. 2. Velveteen Dream (Last Week: Not Ranked) - Imagine watching him come out for his match with K...

OH YEAH BABY THE ATTITUDE ERA Photo Credit: WWE.com Oh, welcome back all you readers, or should I say NEWS FIENDS. I am HORB FLERBMINBER, and this newsletter is the MOST TRUSTED SOURCE FOR WRESTLING NEWS ON THE INTERNET, nay, ANYWHERE ON PLANET EARTH. I would be the most trusted news source for wrestling on Gamma Prime in the Andromeda Galaxy, but Dave Meltzer SLANDERED ME with accusations of simony and institutional malfeasance he got from a MySpace account. HE'S BRANCHING OUT, PEOPLE. Honestly, if you just want to read the newsletter, that's okay I guess, but don't even THINK about looking me in the eye in public if you don't go WHOLE HORB. What does that mean? Well, you should definitely follow me on Twitter, @ HorbFlerbminber . Where else can you get up to the NANOSECOND news updates? Certainly not from following that hack Rajah. DID YOU KNOW HIS NEWS WAS WRONG 69 PERCENT OF THE TIME? That is certainly not nice. Also, you should definitely buy back issues of my news...