Wrestling Undertaker Assets

They tore the pyramid down on Sunday Photo via New Japan Pro Wrestling Strong Style Evolved was nothing to write home about, compared at least to both G1 Special shows from last year. Sure, the wrestling was fine, especially on the back-half of the show. If you edited some of the slog parts out of the Hangman Page/ Knife Pervert Jay White match, that turns into a fine semifinal title match on a strong B-show. The Kazuchika Okada and Tomohiro Ishii vs. Zack Sabre, Jr. and Minoru Suzuki match was a delightfully violent feud-furthering interstitial that helped heap more coal into the furnace for the Okada/Sabre IWGP Championship match this coming Sunday. Several other matches had fun moments. However, while the G1 Specials felt like marquee events, Strong Style Evolved had a distinct house show feeling to it. The show, up until the end of the White/Page match, felt fun but inconsequential at best. Then, the Golden Lovers and Young Bucks took the ring and gave the event its raison d'e...

The Bucks have found their venue for All In Photo Credit: Scott Finkelstein The show that started out as a friendly bet with Dave Meltzer has found a venue, and now feels like a real thing that is going to happen. All In, the independent wrestling show promoted by Cody Rhodes and the Young Bucks, will take place at the Sears Centre Arena in Hoffman Estates, IL, a suburb of Chicago. The 11,000+ seat arena currently is home to the Windy City Bulls of the National Basketball Association's developmental league, the G-League, the Chicago Mustangs of the Major Arena Soccer League, and the Chicago Bliss of the Legends Football League (formerly Lingerie Football League). The arena has hosted pro wrestling before, as it was the home of TNA's Bound For Glory in 2008. The arena announcement is the last major piece of the puzzle to be announced, after the date (September 1) and the headline talent. The first wrestlers to be named for the show are Rhodes, the Bucks, Marty Scurll, Hangman Pa...

A BONA FIDE HALL OF FAMER Photo Credit: WWE.com Well, well, well, HORB FLERBMINBER is back to give you all the news you can shove into your shopping cart without tripping an alarm. How much is that, exactly? Well, it's WAY more than bottles of Mal�rt at Binny's Beverage Depot, that's for sure. I KNOW THAT FROM EXPERIENCE. Anyway, I will have all the best news and opinions this week, WAY MORE than that hack Dave Meltzer. Did you know he trolls Tumblr for information to smear assault victims? That part isn't a joke. Fuck him. Anyway... If you want the full HORB EXPERIENCE, then you have to do one of two things, preferably both. The first is follow me on Twitter, @ HorbFlerbminber . Why would you NOT want to, unless you didn't want the most up-to-date news on things that matter without whining and complaining that I'm not getting the credit I deserve like Brad Shepard. Seriously, fuck him too. Also, you can get old issues of the newsletter that you can read on your...

PIZZZZZZAAAAAAAAAAAAA Photo Credit: TH It's Twitter Request Line time, everyone! I take to Twitter to get questions about issues in wrestling, past and present, and answer them on here because 140 characters can't restrain me, fool! If you don't know already, follow me @tholzerman , and wait for the call on Wednesday to ask your questions. Hash-tag your questions #TweetBag , and look for the bag to drop Thursday afternoon (most of the time). Without further ado, here are your questions and my answers: FMK: new york pizza, chicago pizza, st louis pizza � TV's Brent (@TVsBrent) February 14, 2018 For those who don't know, FMK is the "fuck, marry, kill" game, usually played with three people. It's crude, but it relays certain desires. It's way less problematic when done with food, unless you're one of those kinky mfers who likes foodplay in the bedroom. Note, I am not here to fuck the pizza. In this case, the "fuck" is for pizza I'd e...

ROUSEY NEWS! Photo Credit: WWE.com Today is the most important day of the week. Why? Valentine's Day? NO, that's just a day invented by WWE to honor Greg The Hammer. Ash Wednesday? Pfft, Jesus Christ was a mark. No, it's HORB NEWSLETTER DAY. That's right, PRO WRESTLING SKOOPZ is back with your man HORB FLERBMINBER bringing you the high heat on takes and all the fresh news. Who has the better handle on news? Not Bruce Mitchell, that's for damn sure. HE SPENDS MOST OF HIS TIME ON REDDIT BEING SHOCKED AT KENNY OMEGA'S SEXUALITY. You can just read the newsletter, but why would you just  want to read the newsletter? That'd be like going to a Brazilian steakhouse and not wanting to fuck the meat. IT FEELS GOOD AGAINST YOUR GENITALS. You should want to get the FULL HORB EXPERIENCE. First, follow me @ HorbFlerbminber  on Twitter. If you don't follow me on Twitter, how will you know when news breaks? Hell, how will you know when wind breaks at Titan Towers? VINCE...

Jordan has neck issues Photo Credit: WWE.com So, are all you REPROBATES and BELLENDS done celebrating the Super Bowl? Huh? HUH? I know Holzerman isn't, that motherfucker. He still stinks of Victory Golden Monkey and horseshit. WHO DOES HE THINK HE IS DOING ALL THAT HIGHFALLUTIN' STUFF. Only rat vomit and Jeppsen's Malort for your newsmaster, HORB FLERBMINBER. That's right, I'm DRUNK ALL THE TIME, not just when some shitty football team finally stops being shitty long enough to win something. BESIDES, I'M A FAN OF THE DECATUR STALEYS. It's hard to be disappointed with a team that DOESN'T EVEN EXIST ANYMORE. You know what does exist though? MY TWITTER ACCOUNT. That's right, you won't get the full HORB EXPERIENCE unless you follow me @ HorbFlerbminber . When else will you be able to see me post DMs from Vader about the time he loaded ferrets into a bazooka and fired them at Mitsuharu Misawa as a rib? YOU WON'T KNOW UNLESS YOU FOLLOW ME. Also, yo...

THE REAL STAR FROM SUNDAY Photo Credit: WWE.com Hey, did you know who's back this week? No, it's not CM PUNK. He's off planning BENGHAZI 2: BENGHAZI HARDER. How did I get that information? WOULDN'T YOU LIKE TO KNOW. No, HORB FLERBMINBER IS BACK, and he's taking no prisoners. YOU HEAR ME, BRAD SHEPARD? I KNOW YOU STOLE ALL MY SCOOPS AND PASSED THEM OFF AS YOUR OWN. Just remember that next time you go to Panera Bread and order a breakfast sandwich. THEY BUY THEIR EGGS FROM ME, AND I HAVE PLENTY OF WEAPONIZED LISTERIA TO GO AROUND, MOTHERFUCKER. Of course, you want to get the whole HORB EXPERIENCE. You don't just read the newsletter and think to yourself, "Oh, this is just enough Horb to get me through the week," because if you do, YOU'RE A FUCKING MARK. You're not a FUCKING MARK, are you? Then first, you have to follow me on Twitter, @ HorbFlerbminber . Nowhere else will you find the best news that I stole from the brain of psychic bugs who have ...